Happy Anniversary!

23 years.....two kids...a cat and dog...a home...numerous ups and downs...friends and family that have come and gone...we're still here - here's to the best part of my life! * o

Happy Anniversary!

I spent my birthday....

yesterday at this gorgeous place, with my "bestest" friend. We were attending a watercolor workshop, taught by Biljana Baker a local artist. It was a gorgeous day as you can tell by the photos and so much fun. Learned lots I didn't know about how to use watercolors, some brush techniques, and using masking fluid to create a resist. Biljana is an amazing artist with a wonderful warm personality - you could tell she was enjoying herself. I really love when someone who is teaching you is also passionate about what they are doing. That enthusiasm just overflows to the students! Add a gorgeous location with tons of atmosphere, and overall it was a pretty good day. Later that night we relaxed around the fire pit at my place with friends and family. Everyone surprised me this year with artsy presents - brushes, markers, stamps, a mosaic stepping stone kit, a heron sculpture.....I was totally spoiled. High School Boy, home for the weekend, made the birthday cake which was yummy! And there was plenty of sunshine, something so desperately needed around here.

(photos - Quebec Lodge where the workshop was held, the awesome view from the lodge, Lynn and me) * o

I spent my birthday....

Butterfly Woman

The story of Butterfly Woman

Butterfly Woman was born a small caterpillar in a rather nondescript garden. She had an uneventful childhood in the garden, going to school with the other caterpillars learning how to avoid becoming a bird’s tasty lunch. She entered her teen years a shy, awkward caterpillar with a few close friends. She worked in the garden, always looking up and dreaming of one day flying around the garden just like the birds and bees. Deep down inside she knew the caterpillars could change, that transformation was possible, but she didn’t know how to do it and she was afraid. So she continued to live and work in the garden, and to read about other caterpillars who had transformed into butterflies. She learned that some caterpillars transformed by “thinking” themselves into butterflies. Others prayed and tried to live good lives. Some tried to eat only certain foods and exercise regularly at certain times. Butterfly Woman became so confused – there were so many ways to transform and so much advice out there she just didn’t know what to do. She felt so lost and lonely. One autumn night in the garden, while looking up at the stars, she fell into a deep, deep sleep. The darkness seemed to close in around her, and she slept longer and deeper. She dreamed of blue summer skies, and flowers, and floating. Then her dreams became dark and scary. Caterpillars, slugs and dark beetles taunted her and poked her. “You’ll never be good enough to be a butterfly” they hissed. And, “you have to do it our way, you’ll never get it right”. They pushed her down winding paths with confusing signs that pointed here and there. “This is the way.” “No! Go here.” “Don’t do this!” Butterfly Woman grew weaker and began to cry. Then she saw a pale, luminescent green light coming towards here. The light grew brighter and stronger, and as it got closer, she saw that it was coming from a beautiful Luna Moth Fairy. The Luna Moth Fairy hugged her, and wiped her tears away. “There, there little one. All you need to remember is that you are loved and you are love. That is all there is to know”, whispered the Luna Moth Fairy as she handed Butterfly Woman a tiny, beautiful, leather-bound book. “All you need to know is in here.” Luna Moth Fairy left her, and Butterfly Woman opened the book. On the first page, in beautiful scrolled letters was written, “This above all, to thine own self be true”. Butterfly Woman felt her self growing strong, and her heart so full of love that she thought she would burst. She stretched her arms out against the darkness and pushed it away with all her might. She awoke to beautiful, sunny morning in the garden. She felt cold and damp, but the sun’s light quickly warmed her. She looked at herself and gasped. Where once had been a plain, dumpy caterpillar in green dress, she was now wearing a beautiful yellow gown. A tingling came from her back and as she twisted her neck to look over her shoulder she saw the most beautiful pair of orange and black wings. Wings! She had wings! Beside her on the ground she spotted the little book the Luna Moth Fairy had given her. So this was more than just a dream, she thought. Lifting her face to the sky, and stretching out her wings she soared up over the garden. She couldn’t believe how beautiful it really was, and how tiny compared to everything she could see from her new vantage point in the sky. And so began her journey to explore this world, armed with the book the Luna Moth Fairy had given her, and the knowledge that she was loved and was love, and could do anything she set her mind to.

(Butterly Woman is the heroine I have created as part of The Artist's Healing Journey) * o

Butterfly Woman

'Shor is quiet round these parts.....

Dropped High School Boy off at camp yesterday, where he will be volunteering for the next couple of a weeks. Doesn't seem like all that long ago when we dropped him off for his first time at camp. His first ever week away from home. We worried that he wouldn't like it, or would be homesick. Instead he took to it like a duck to water and has been going every summer since with the exception of one. He strolls confidently across the field this boy-man - he shaves now, has a girlfriend, and a social network that spans 100 Km. Always off to new adventures. I'm glad that both my sons have way more confidence than I did at their age. I'm glad they are tackling the world with gusto, and I am an immensely proud mom of the two fine young men they are turning out to be. * o

'Shor is quiet round these parts.....

This...in my email this morning...

Today's poem offering from the Panhala list speaks volumes to me right now:

In the Middle

of a life that's as complicated as everyone else's,
struggling for balance, juggling time.
The mantle clock that was my grandfather's
has stopped at 9:20; we haven't had time
to get it repaired. The brass pendulum is still,
the chimes don't ring. One day you look out the window,
green summer, the next, and the leaves have already fallen,
and a grey sky lowers the horizon. Our children almost grown,
our parents gone, it happened so fast. Each day, we must learn
again how to love, between morning's quick coffee
and evening's slow return. Steam from a pot of soup rises,
mixing with the yeasty smell of baking bread. Our bodies
twine, and the big black dog pushes his great head between;
his tail is a metronome, 3/4 time. We'll never get there,
Time is always ahead of us, running down the beach, urging
us on faster, faster, but sometimes we take off our watches,
sometimes we lie in the hammock, caught between the mesh
of rope and the net of stars, suspended, tangled up
in love, running out of time.

~ Barbara Crooker ~
(Yarrow)

photo: bumblebee - beside the deck this morning

* o

This...in my email this morning...

The Last Day of June

It's 9:30 in the morning and I am sitting out on the deck, eating my breakfast, still in my jammies, enjoying the cool morning air, the sunshine, the birds singing - totally awesome after all the rain. I love that I have until Wednesday off from work. I love that I have been sleeping in, being creative, and following the rhythms of my own time.

It's mid-morning and I'm making another cup of tea. I am content, and lazy, and still not dressed for the day and I don't care. It's the end of June and it has taken me long enough to get here.

photo - blue sky and my beloved oak tree doing it's own form of sun salutation * o

The Last Day of June

If this is Saturday.....it must be raining...

Lately, it pretty much rains every day. Great for the trees and the grass, both of which are lush and green. Not so great for headaches, and moods, and trying to get outdoors and enjoy the long summer days. I'm starting to feel like the fungus on the willow chair..... * o

If this is Saturday.....it must be raining...

Trying to Slow Down

This is a collage I created that was inspired by my experience walking the labyrinth last month. I finally finished it last weekend. The labyrinth has tiny snails along the path, which is made of chunky wool. The outside of the labyrinth is made of tiny polished rocks. The woman is doing "Tree Pose" - a yoga asana.

I keep trying to remind myself of this image - to slow down, to be grounded like the tree. It seems like I just fly through my days and weeks, and lately I have had very little energy to do more than just go to work and then crash on my couch in the evenings. Maybe my body is trying to force me to "slow down"? I've certainly been giving up a lot of things, and thinking about just where and how I want to spend my time. Slowing down, in this culture, is not an easy task. * o

Trying to Slow Down

Creating a Journal - Part Two

The front cover. I like the feel of this journal - it's a good size, and the envelopes make a nice thick paper to work with! * o

Creating a Journal - Part Two

Creating a Journal

I started collecting envelopes a while back because I wanted to try making a journal from them. Thought this would be a good time to try it out for the "Healing Journey" course. This journal has three signatures of 6 envelopes each. * o

Creating a Journal

Journaling Courses coming up

My friend Zura is offering her "Fun Art Journaling" course again - starting June 30th. This is a great course for both beginners and experienced journalers. Three months of lessons, tips, and a yahoo group to help support you along the way. I learned a lot about art journaling from taking Zura's courses, and she really gives you a wealth of materials to work with. You can read about it and sign up here.

Also starting June 30th - Lani Gerity's "The Artist's Healing Journey". This is a 12-week course using the heroine's journey - an exploration of renewal and healing using art. You can read about it here.

I've signed up for the Healing Journey course and am looking forward to working on that soon. Today, I'm going to start working on making a journal just for this course. If I get it finished this weekend, I'll post pics.

image - spirit fruits - pen, ink and pastel - @2008

* o

Journaling Courses coming up

Art vs Craft

The other night I was at a local women’s business dinner when the subject of conversation turned to artists and a possible informal meeting of people interested in art in the community. The conversation was piquing my interest and curiosity and had grabbed the attention of a woman seating at my table who happens to be an artist specializing in carving and sculpture. The Artist mentioned that she would really like to see some sort of art guild formed in the area. Up to this point in the evening I had been enjoying my conversation with The Artist, but this is where I left my comfort zone and naively inquired “would you consider amateur artists part of the guild?” (Me thinking amateur as in not exhibited, not formally trained, etc.). So began a discussion on “art” vs. “crafts” and “artist” vs “artisan” and how one had to be careful in distinguishing the two. This is when my inner critic chose to show up, sit comfortably on my shoulder and begin the process of deflating my energy balloon by insidiously whispering “you are not an artist” and “you are not in the same league as the Big Kids” followed by hissing in a Gollum like voice “you do Crraaaffftttsss………”. Mr. Inner Critic carries a heavy weight and while he whispered, I nodded politely and began detaching myself from the conversation.

I carried Mr. Inner Critic’s weight home with me, my balloon now completely deflated and dragging along behind me as I pondered the evening. And then I gave Mr. Inner Critic the slap upside the head he deserved.

You see, I might not be a Big Kid artist, but then I’m not trying to be one either. The argument about what makes a “real artist” is the same argument in the writing circles about what makes you a “real writer”. Is it training? Is it how much you sell? Are you a writer if you self-publish? What about if your writing is only published online and you haven’t been paid for it? Professional vs amateur? These arguments, I suppose, have validity for those trying to make a living from their art. And don’t get me wrong, I love and admire the Big Kid artists and writers. Nothing moves me more than a well written novel or inspires me like a beautiful painting. I am in awe and envy of some of the work I see out there, and I try to support and learn from these artists as much as I can. I am not judging The Artist for her views on what constitutes art and an art guild is an awesome way to get the work of the many talented artists in the area out there for people to see. I just happen to believe that there’s a place in this world for all the artists, writers, artisans, crafters, journalers, bloggers, etc. It’s all good.

No, my dialogue with Mr. Inner Critic, my own personal art monster, gave me a chance to define what it is that I’m really passionate about and what art means to me. When I grow up, I want to be an “Inner Child midwife”. I want people to get back in touch with that child that loved to play with paints and crayons and got lost in the act of creating and not in competition or trying to impress. I love doing journal and art journal workshops and watching people transform themselves from “I can’t write, I’m not really any good at this” to total excitement about what they can do with their creativity. I love squishing people’s art monsters and Inner Critics. When I go out into my little cottage studio to create, whether it’s collage or clay or paint or write, I’m getting in touch with the creative essence of the Divine. It’s my form of prayer. Art is a sacred tool, an inner healer. There are days when the act of creating is more important than the finished product, and whether or not it constitutes art is not important. This is a process of self-transformation, not a competition with another artist. I think no matter what you are, it’s important to know what gives you joy and to stand firm in that no matter what the outside world thinks.

Call me a crafter, an artisan, an amateur, whatever. They’re just labels. But, if your inner child is longing to get out and play, call me. We’ll have some fun in the cottage – no art monsters allowed.

- photo, art journal page "Believe" @2008 * o

Art vs Craft

The Inner Sanctuary

The inside of the cottage - where I go to restore, to create, to get away. My little sanctuary. * o

The Inner Sanctuary

Life in a Northern Town

One of the things I enjoy about living in a Very Small Town, is we can do things you can't in a big city. Like last night, which just happened to be one of the nicest evenings we've had yet this spring (finally!). We lit our first fire of the season in our outdoor pit, and sat around with CollegeBoy who is home for the summer, and just generally enjoyed the warm sunshine, the evening birds singing and the conversation. High School Boy even graced us with his presence for a little bit. Then, as the evening light turned dusky and the coals were just right, we roasted wienies for a late snack and went inside to enjoy a movie. Life doesn't get much better than that. * o

Life in a Northern Town

I'm not bitchy...I'm just releasing

At the end of the yoga session last night, my awesome yoga instructor tells us "you've released a lot here tonight, notice that over the next couple days - how your body has released. You may even feel bitchy, but you're not really, you're just releasing".

I want a t-shirt that says "I'm not bitchy, I'm just releasing"............ * o

I'm not bitchy...I'm just releasing

Who the Heck Stole Spring?

Woke this morning to a cold, windy, wet and flurry-ing type of day - bleck! When is it going to warm up and be spring???

At least I had a creative and relaxing weekend. Spent some time working on my art course, and also playing with polymer clay and doing some collages. Worked part of the time at the kitchen table and the rest of the time in the cottage. It is so wonderful to be out there again, in my own space. Restores my sanity.

There are a lot of artists blogs and books that are fueling my creativity these days. Thought I'd share a few of them here:

Books

• Mixed Media Mosiacs - Laurie Mika - I'm not only a fan of Laurie's work, showcased throughout, but I love how well the techniques are photographed and how clear the instructions are, something a beginner like myself can truly appreciate.
• Making Connections - Susan Lenart Kazmer - I didn't even know what a "cold join" was until I got this book. Beautifully photographed and one of those books you pick up just to flip through the pictures and admire the work.

Magazines I Must Have

• Art and Life - www.teeshamoore.com
• Cloth, Paper, Scissors
• Somerset Studio

Artists Who Inspire, Challenge and just generally Make Me Envious

• Teesha Moore
• Nina Bagley
• Kelly Rae Roberts
• Michael de Meng
• Judy Wise
• Christine Valters Paintner
• Shiloh Sophia McCloud

Great websites for art and supplies

• Artella
• Art Chix Studios

Books ordered and soon to be drooled over

• Secrets of Rusty Things - Michael de Meng
• Taking Flight - Kelly Rae Roberts

* o

Who the Heck Stole Spring?

I Heart The Weepies

Stumbled upon a reference to The Weepies while surfing blogs today.

Currently listening to the new album, Hideaway, available on iTunes.

LOVE IT! * o

I Heart The Weepies

Mandala

The snail reminding me to slow down, and stay close to center.

The tree, reminding me to stay grounded. * o

Mandala

Standing.....ready to go in

Despite an onslaught of wet weather I managed to walk the labyrinth three times over the weekend. Each time, it took until I reached center to unwind my mind. The twists, the turns, getting closer to center and then further away were physical metaphors of my life's journey and my spiritual one. Sometimes, I felt like I'd never get to the center. Once, I got to center quickly and then walking out it seemed to take forever.

At center, I felt grounded and peaceful. I wanted to spend a long time in the center, but there was always a time issue or a weather issue and I felt like I needed to leave. Again, much like my life - I want to spend more time centered by there is always something else needing to be done, someplace else I need to go to.

Around me the birds sang, the squirrels squawked and the trees rustled. I found the most beautiful snails along the path - beige/brown shells that spiraled and wound themselves tight to center. They were probably out enjoying the damp bark of the path and the wet weather because on the last morning, when it was drier, I didn't see any.

Grounded and strengthened. God is good. * o

Standing.....ready to go in

The Labyrinth

* o

The Labyrinth